Overwhelmed

I'm not sure where to start this blog post, so I'll just start with this - chemo cycle 5 was not my friend.  Worst nausea yet to the extent that the taste of water was disgusting and I got super dehydrated and was miserable, and not able to really move or participate in life for about 8-9 days.  I also got a skin infection on my hand called cellulitis that caused like a massive burn and peeling on my hand, for which I am taking antibiotics that  make me more nauseous and tired.  Good times.  But you know what?  In 21 days chemo will be a memory and I hope to forget all these little pesky details.  Forever.

I met with a naturopath today as well as I look toward restoring my health and energy after chemo and am optimistic but totally depressed about the plan after that meeting.  She informed me that I should be eating a diet of 70% vegetables and even gave me specific vegetables bc she could tell I had some specific deficiencies based on my physical.  She also took blood and will run a full nutrient panel and test me for the MTHFR gene (commonly referred to as the mother fucker gene) which, if I get a positive result, means there might be other stuff going on around the way my body works that will need some refinement to avoid recurrence and other problems.  I go back in early July for those results and to talk about how my diet is going.   70% vegetables?  I can't even imagine.  Any recommendations out there for cookbooks or sites for paleo or increasing veggie consumption?  I really can't imagine accomplishing that, I'm totally a bread, cheese and sugar girl, so any thoughts or referrals are appreciated on that topic!!

I also have to start figuring out what the hell I am going to do about the Tamoxifen.  I am supposed to start that right away after my last chemo cycle, so the last week of June, but I hear major horror stories about it, and this big study came back this week about an alternative to Tamoxifen that might have better results and so I have to talk to my oncologist about that bc tamoxifen terrifies me.  I also have about a million questions for my oncologist as I head into post-chemo, avoid recurrence stage of my breast cancer.  Like, how worried should I be about living close to the Wilmington Refinery and the Port of LA?  I worry about it constantly and wonder if the worry or the reality is worse for me.  Also, do we need to get our house tested for radon?  Is either toothpaste or deodorant toxic and potentially carcinogenic?  What about microwaving?  What about storing food in plastic Tupperware or ziploc containers? Milk, dairy, wine, red meat????   People have sent me a million articles about a million things and I don't know what's real and valid and should actually merit an action.  And it is all stressful! But dammit, I will not have a recurrence!!!

So Monday I head in for my last chemo and I just can't believe it.  I made it!!  I couldn't have done it without you!!  I'll continue to keep everyone posted on my progress.  Thanks for reading!