HALFWAY DONE

Had my last white blood cell shot today which means I am officially halfway done with chemo, only 74 days to go!  Thanks to everyone who checked in on me, I am doing really well, the new nausea drug (EMEND) was helpful and so I haven't been as knocked out as last round.  Even with the nausea, I am not one of those people who is so nauseous I can't eat, unfortunately, so I feel bad, but I can still eat, and then I just feel worse after eating and take more meds and so it is a bad cycle with a large part of the blame being on me for being a foodie/overeater.  I still have weird aversions, so certain smells or the thought of a lot of foods makes my mouth water in a bad, I am going to throw up sort of way, but turkey burgers and bagels and rice...mostly plain stuff is going down just fine and in decent quantities.  Of course, my skinny friends who have gone through chemo could not eat bc of the nausea and so lost weight...but not me...still ten pounds up.  Oh well, I am feeling super strong and am HALFWAY done and am totally going to get through this hell!

My current project is researching local restaurants for my post-chemo dinner/wine celebration with the husband.  (Do I have an over-fascination/addiction to food or what?)  but I know exactly what I want for all courses, and so I am looking for a good place that can do sushi, steak and chocolate souffle.  And where I can bring my own wine and not get charged a ridiculous corkage.  Leaning toward Houstons or Flemings, but let me know if you have other recommendations.

I also started a new series - Orange is the New Black - during my last chemo so I have something new to keep me company when I wake up dripping sweat with heart palpitations in the middle of the night.  It's kind of extreme based on just the first episode, but I am going to give it a try, then will try to catch up on either Mad Men or Game of Thrones, which I stopped watching during season 2.

We're also still planning our summer vacation which has changed shape like a dozen times, so who knows what we'll end up doing, but I need to get something planned so I have that to look forward to through the rest of chemo and then as I move into just herceptin infusions and the tamoxefin (sp?). (Boo.)

The husband and I are going to spend the post-chemo summer months getting Karina's room in order (it was his office and we never actually made it into a kids room, poor second kid that she is) and figuring out our long term life plan.  If anything is going to be gained from this experience, I think we want to spend some time considering what really matters to us as a family, how we can get that, and how that all ties into our kids' educational plans.

Anyway, I am feeling really excited as this phase of treatment comes to the halfway point and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel (for this phase as well.) I am really optimistic that the herceptin only infusions are gong to be a breeze and that tamoxofin won't totally knock me on my ass.  I hope I'm not fooling myself.  It's good to feel optimistic and EXCITED.  It's funny too bc everyone that I see says I look really HAPPY, or GLOWING, or EXCITED and I really do feel that way when I am not overcome with exhaustion and nausea.  I feel like I am really lucky to have this chance to think about and plan for the kind of life I want to have moving forward.  I want to make the most of this time and make positive changes that will benefit not only me but also the kids, everything from how we eat to where we live to how we spend our work and free time.  There is so much to think about and it is all good.  I am happy.

Lastly, I will be doing the Revlon Walk on Mother's Day with Chris and my mom as well as the Susan Love walk/run in Pacific Palisades the weekend after Mother's Day for anyone looking to join us on a walk.  I think they are the second and third weekends in May.  I also got a free photo sent to me from the Hollywood 10 K which I am posting below.  I envision myself looking so much more athletic doing these things, but whatever, I did a 10K while undergoing chemo and so cancer can kiss my ass. :)

Hope you are all well.  Thanks for reading.